A Barrel of Fun

A Barrel of Fun (1x01) is the first episode of the first chapter of the first campaign for Shikar.

A monk and druid go to the market and get more than they bargained for when they meet a drunken gnome, an abrasive half-orc, and a tiefling child.

This Little Monk Went to Market
We come first upon a beautiful veranda with gilded gates, surrounded by wheat fields in all directions. This area is known as Moonblush Valley. Outside of the gates we meet Scorpio, a willowy half-elf man with flowing hair, carrying two buckets of water on his back.

One of the buckets slips and falls, but the swift hand of Akash, Scorpio's instructor, catches it. He compliments Scorpio on his improvement and helps Scorpio lower the second bucket. Akash informs Scorpio that he must also train his spirit and his mind as well as his body. Scorpio laments his illusive mind, revealing that he has lost his memories. Akash hopes that with training, Scorpio's memories will return to him, but if not it is time to make new memories.

Akash tasks Scorpio with manning the stall in the local market where the monastery sells their crafted brew. He informs Scorpio that he will have aid, and introduces him to Valym, a local tankard craftsman. Akash hopes that Valym will keep an eye on Scorpio at the market, but Valym has his reservations. Akash just asks that Valym ensures that Scorpio doesn't get robbed.

Akash also challenges Scorpio to gain the commendation of the market, and promises to teach the young monk the techniques he has been asking after. Scorpio eagerly agrees as Akash places 5 copper pieces in his palm. They load the cart with their barrels, Valym takes the reigns and they head for the town of Golden Dale.

On the way, they pass one of Scorpios rivals, The Bull. She laughs as they drive by, taunting the young half-elf. Scorpio attempts a retort, but Valym quickly speeds the cart up to avoid embarrassment.

The Reluctant Chaperone
Across town, we come across a very lacquered dark grey carriage. It creeks slowly through a mostly dead forest. Betsy, a jet black-haired, caramel skinned woman, stops the carriage at a fork in the road and jumps down from the driver's perch to knock on the carriage door, calling out for Nim Grimwillow.

Nim, a grey skinned, watery-eyed, Tiefling child, emerges from the carriage. This is Nim's first venture out on his own and he is very nervous about it. Betsy introduces Nim to his chaperone, a half-orc named Ajax. Ajax and Betsy have an easy back and forth. Nim introduces himself and Ajax asks about Nim's mom, hoping to see her again soon. Nim is anxious to leave the woods.

Before leaving, Betsy pulls Ajax aside and expresses her concern for the child. On the way to meet Ajax, she had asked Nim to sing her a song and he sang her three dirges. Ajax is upset that Betsy lured him into a babysitting gig by lying that the boy's mother would be there. Betsy convinces Ajax to take the job and presses three silver pieces into his hand, asking him to pick up some ale from the local monastery's booth.

Betsy says goodbye to Nim and they part ways. Nim reaches for Ajax's hand and then thinks better of it and decides to walk beside Ajax.

Blooming Sunflower
Valym and Scorpio have managed to set up their stall. Their conversation has drifted to the topic of Valym's craft as a tankard maker. Valym demonstrates his skills, but realizes he can't fit all of the letters of Scorpio's name on the tankard and settles for Scorp.

Scorpio wants to impress his master and asks for Valym's assistance in selling all of the ale and being the best stall at the festival so that they can win the award. Valym questions the quality of the ale and Scorpio insists that he try it. As Scorpio's back is turned, preparing a drink for Valym, the druid ritually casts Purify Food and Drink on the casks. Valym knows that the monk's training involves the brewing process of the ale, training their minds and bodies in the process. He drinks the ale and tastes light hops and a rich chocolate.

Scorpio calls out a greeting to the market, imploring them to buy from his stall. Valym assists with a rhyme and Scorpio spins into a cartwheel that draws attention. A passing gnome with blonde pig-tails and a high nasally voice stops and orders a brew, saying if she likes it she will tell all of her friends. Valym flirts with the gnome who reveals that he name is Sunflower. She requests that Valym carves a bee nestled on a sunflower for her commemorative tankard. Scorpio offers her a sample and she asks if the Blue Swallow Meadery across the way is their competition.

Scorpio asks her if she knows if their mead is any good. She expresses that it is very good, and they offer a wide selection. Valym tells her that the monastery offers chocolate ale and she is unimpressed. Scorpio recruits Sunflower to spy on the Blue Swallow Meadery. At first she is hesitant but Valym seals the deal with his impressive bumblebee on a sunflower carving. Sunflower admits that she is unsurprisingly drunk and takes her hot-mess over to the Blue Swallow Meadery's booth.

Gone Fishing
Across the fair, Ajax and Nim enter the makeshift fair grounds. They see an archery range set up on the left and food stalls to the right. In the center of it all sits a well. An 18+ section is marked off for those that can enjoy alcoholic beverages and Ajax checks in with Nim to see how he is doing. Nim is anxious about everything that is happening around him and Ajax offers to buy him an ale. Nim is aghast, but settles for food.

Ajax purchases Nim a few pork buns, pulled freshly from the dwarven proprietor's oven. Ralph, the dwarven cook, goes to pat Nim on the head, but has his wrist snatched by Ajax. The dwarf apologizes, saying he was just being friendly. Ajax takes Nim to the barrels that have been turned into tables. They discuss their lives, and Ajax reveals that everything has been pretty awful. He changes subjects, asking is Nim has any siblings.

Nim glances at the well at the center of the marketplace and tells Ajax that he used to have a sister, but there was an accident and she passed away. Ajax comforts the child as the boy bites into the spicy pork bun. He cries out in panic, exclaiming his distress. Ajax grabs the closest source of water and hands Nim the handwashing bucket. Nim chugs the water and is greeted with a stomach ache. Ajax carries Nim on his back and they head for the goldfish ring-toss station.

A silver-haired, lavender skinned Tiefling in a yellow flowered sundress greets them, exchanging five rings for five copper pieces. Ajax tosses the rings but misses. He immediately asks for five more rings. Nim grants Ajax some Bardic Inspiration through a quick inspirational rhyme. With the boost of determination, Ajax lands all five rings. The woman hands Nim five goldfish in a bucket, which he balances on top of Ajax's head. Ajax insists they have goofed off enough and wants to get the ale for Betsy. Nim says he wants to take the path furthest from the well.

Ajax passes into the drinking area where a band is playing for the patrons. Nim pulls out his pan flute, excited by the new music he hears and attempts to match the melody that the band is playing. Nim manages to catch some of it, and hopes to keep practicing. Ajax starts to dance until water hits his shoulder from the bucket of fish causing him to stop. As he gets ready to leave, something runs into Ajax, causing Nim to drop the bucket of fish.

Ajax notices a golden haired gnome that has crashed into his knee and Nim rushes to save the fish and snatches up a few. He is missing one and a young green-skinned boy finds it for him. Sunflower apologizes for running into Ajax who tells her to watch where she is going. She gets defensive, telling him that he is extremely rude and tells him she will call the guards. Ajax looks for Nim and spots him being led by a small green-skinned child. With his attention elsewhere, Sunflower hits him in the back of the knee, sending him tumbling to the ground. Ajax apologizes and Sunflower departs, telling the half-orc to take care of his child.

The child pours some ale into the bucket of fish, hoping to help, but Nim begins freaking out, knowing that ale is not good for fish. Ajax snatches the bucket away, telling Nim that they will need to get some water from the well or the fish will die.

On the other side of the market, Valym and Scorpio's sales have been going well. They spot Sunflower swaggering through the crowd, pushing her way to the front. She exclaims that she has been spreading all of the "truths" about the Blue Swallow Meadery, and how bees sh*t in the ale. She also explains that she got in a tussle with a half-orc and she beat the brakes off of him. She is even more excited when Valym says that he will translate for her if they ever run across a swallow. She says that she has always wanted to talk to her pet turtle and that the two should come to her house to meet him.

While she was doing her mission, she overheard the Blue Swallow Meadery talking about getting back at the two. She informs the duo that if they have any problems to call for her and she will crack their knee caps for them. Scorpio refills her flagon and watches her stumble back into the crowd. Scorpio is worried, explaining to Valym that the Blue Swallow Meadery is pretty tough.

Nim's body is frozen by the well, terrified of the thing that took his sister. Ajax tries to comfort the child and tells him to cover his ears and to stay where he is. He takes the bucket from Nim and goes to the well. As he reaches for the well, Nim rushes forward and latches onto the half-orc's leg, pleading with the man not to leave him. Nim says he doesn’t want the voices to get him and he doesn't want to lose his only friend.

Ajax, confused by the child's fear, sends the bucket of fish down the well, retrieving only three fish when he draws it back up. Peering back in, he sees two escaped the bucket into the well. Nim is happy that they are all alive and Ajax laments how much copper he spent on the fish. Nim pulls the money his mom gave him from his pocket and offers the half-orc six copper. Nim then names the biggest goldfish Ajax.

The orc child pulls on Ajax's sleeve, confusing the man with his dad. Ajax asks if Nim knows the boy, who introduces himself as Tracy and asks Nim to be his friend. Ajax, still confused as to who Tracy is, asks where the boy's mother is. The boy points to the woman running the archery area and says her name is Donna Ravencall. Ajax says, "Oh fuck." as he recognizes the woman and does some quick math in his head, determining that he is not the kids father. They part ways with the boy.

Sabotage!
Ajax heads to Valym and Scorpio's stand and Nim asks for some ale. Scorpio turns to see the horned Nim and freaks out. Valym, seeing that Ajax is a half-orc, asks if he ran into a gnome earlier. Ajax brushes it off and they introduce themselves. Nim explains that Betsy sent them to get her some ale. Scorpio pulls out a pony keg from under the stall asking for 2 silver pieces. Nim says that they don't have much because Ajax bought him some fish and asks if they can cut a deal because it is all his fault.

Valym asks Ajax if he is a good fighter and explains the situation with the Blue Swallow Meadery. He offers the ale in exchange for protection for the rest of the festival. Nim is delighted and offers to help sell ale. Ajax admits to Valym that he did have a run in with a gnome, but it was a lucky hit. Scorpio finishes pouring the ale, calling out to Valym to take a look at the sad child.

Nim tells them they would make great stories and explains that he loves writing songs and stories. Valym asks if the child sings and pays Nim to sing for the patrons. Nim flips open his journal and sings a dark song, completely misreading the crowd. The crowd begins to leave, but Valym tries to get them to stay. Nim flips to a new page and begins to sing about Ajax and ale, drawing the crowd back in. Nim begins to freestyle, working Scorpio into the song. The crowd begins to tip the little busker and he gains one silver piece worth of praise.

The bindings holding the barrels behind the booth snap and the barrels go rolling. Scorpio leaps on top of one of the rolling barrels, but Valym is not as quick and catches one across the shins. Scorpio reverses the barrels direction, causing it to stop in place. He lunges for another barrel as a man behind one barrel pushes it towards Scorpio. Valym rushes for a rolling barrel, attempting to catch it. He catches the barrel with his chest.

Nim, caught in the chaos, spots the sandy haired man that pushed the barrel at Scorpio, but assumes he isn't part of the commotion. He hops down and casts Cure Wounds on Valym. Ajax dashes for the barrel rolling towards the food court and Scorpio parkours over the barrel rolling at him but doesn't manage to stop it from rolling past him. It slams into another barrel, cracking it. The unknown man tries to run for the crowd but Scorpio spots him and yells out for someone to stop him. One of the barrels falls into the well and another comes to a stop as it crashes into a table.

Valym asks Nim to help Scorpio and takes off after the figure. He pulls a handaxe from his belt and imbeds it in the man's back. The man falls forward onto the ground, knocked unconscious and bleeding out. Nim rushes for one of the cracked barrels and casts Mending to repair the wood. Ajax is surprised by both Valym and Nim's abilities, but runs for Valym, questioning why he threw an axe at this man. Valym shrugs and says Scorpio said to stop him. Ajax attempts to check the man's pulse but determines that the man is dead. He then starts berating Valym.

Scorpio hops from barrel to barrel, checking their condition. He finds another cracked one and manages to reinforce the bindings and seal the leak with some spare wood nearby. Nim walks over to Valym and Ajax and sees the dead body. He checks it and realizes that the man isn't actually dead. Thinking quickly he casts Healing Word on the troublemaker, saving him from an untimely demise.

Valym asks the man why he ran, and he explains that he was just running from the rolling barrels. He is caught in the lie and Nim gets upset that the man would lie. They see that the man is wearing a tunic with a blue bird on it and they deduce that he works for the Blue Swallow Meadery. The man introduces himself as Bobert and says he just wants to keep his job. Ajax suggests the man thanks Nim for saving his life.

Sunflower arrives on the scene, loudly wondering what the commotion is. She says she is the local constabulary. Nim asks if she is "The Bitch" that Ajax spoke of and she hands Nim a ticket. Valym clears up the confusion by playing into Sunflower's lies, placing full blame on the Blue Swallow Meadery. Nim hands the ticket to Ajax, who realizes that he can't afford the fine written on it. Valym attempts to get the group out of the ticket and offers to take Sunflower on a date. She writes her contact information on a slip of paper and officially disqualifies the Blue Swallow Meadery.

Well...That Was Strange...
While the group is speaking with Sunflower, Scorpio manages to shimmy down the well. He grabs the barrel and engages his monk training to shoot the barrel up into the air past the lip of the well. He leaps up as the barrel begins to fall and catches it before it falls back in. Tracy is standing near the well and helps Scorpio lower the barrel.

Valym, witnessing Scorpio's feats, motions to some water and casts Shape Water. Nim is concerned about Ajax the Fish and goes to check on him. Ajax asks Scorpio if he saw two goldfish at the bottom of the well. Valym looks into the well before hopping in. Nim, seeing Valym disappear into the well, cries out, terrified that his new friend has been eaten by the structure. Valym shapes the water into a bubble to contain the fish and pulls the staff from his back. He asks "little sister" for a favor and transforms his staff into a Giant Constrictor Snake. The snake agrees to do it for the price of one fish. Valym agrees and feeds her a fish before she shoots up. Valym steps out of the well and pulls a staff out behind him, hiding the snake from the group.

Ajax and Nim thank Valym as the crowd fixes the surrounding damage to the tables. The other member of the Blue Swallow Meadery stare daggers at the group. A tall elven man introduces himself as the Commissioner of Food and Drink as he approaches the group and awards them the blue ribbon award. He hands Scorpio a booklet containing twenty coupons for the pork bun stall.

Scorpio, nervous about the Blue Swallow Meadery, asks Ajax to stay on as their guard. Nim says that he will need to check in with his mom. Tracy pops in and says he has a mission for the group. He pulls a hand carved soldier from his pocket that has been broken in half and asks the group to bury his toy, Sir Reginald, in the cemetery on the hill. Nim agrees, guaranteeing they will treat him with the utmost respect. Tracy pays them with an amethyst that he found while playing. Ajax, Valym, and Scorpio are amazed at the amethyst and how the boy came across it. Nim handles the rest of the transaction professionally, informing the boy that he will send a letter with how the burial goes.

Valym looks at the address Sunflower gave him and realizes he has no idea where she lives. He has never been to the town listed and is then confused if she is an actual constable since she doesn't even live in this town.

This is where our tale winds down, until next episode.

Player Characters

 * Scorpio - Played by Xander Jeanneret
 * Valym - Played by Gabe Hicks
 * Nim Grimwillow - Played by Josephine McAdam
 * Ajax - Played by Lord Balvin

Non-Player Characters

 * Akash - Scorpio's instructor
 * The Bull - Scorpio's rival
 * Betsy - A friend of Nim's mom
 * Sunflower - A drunken gnome
 * Tracy Ravencall - An orc boy
 * Donna Ravencall - Tracy's mom and fletcher at the archery range
 * Bobert - A Blue Swallow Meadery worker

Locations

 * Moonblush Valley
 * Moonblush Monastery
 * Golden Dale
 * Golden Dale Market

Quotes
"You don't want your loved one to be a corpse on a horse." - Betsy

"That pollen-tosser looks like a hoe." - Sunflower

"Please don't die, please don't die, why does everything have to die?" -Nim to his fish

"Dad?" -Tracy to Ajax

"Is she the bitch?" -Nim about Sunflower